Elder Of Ziyon - Israel News

Sunday, March 08, 2009

The perfect Purim costume - Mohammed

Yerushalimey sends me an interesting entry from a calendar of local Jerusalem events today:

From: McLean Eliyahu

Hello friends, Come join us on at 8PM for a special evening to honour the convergence of 2 holy days, the Jewish Holiday of Purim and the Muslim Holiday of Mawlid al-Nabi, the birthday of the profit Muhammad. In a time when politics tends to divide our peoples, the convergence of the holy days can perhaps can serve as a bridge. Come and share insights about these traditions and celebrations. There will also be teaching about these holy days by special Jewish and Muslim teachers. Also joining will be a special guest, David Heinemann - Author of Sufi Therapy of the Heart. Please bring: a kosher vegetarian dish to share, as this will be the last meal before the Fast of Esther. You are welcome to bring musical instruments in the sprit of celebration for this time of joy for the Abrahamic family.

Yes indeed, today is Mawlid, supposedly Mohammed's birthday (although I see it is also supposed to be the anniversary of his death, perhaps a final Islamic borrowing borrowing of a Jewish tradition about Moses.) According to Sunnis, Mohammed was born/died on the 12th of Rabi'-ul-Awwal, according to Shi'ites, on the 17th.

Notice that in Jerusalem, some Jews try to actually bridge the gap between Islam and Judaism, as misguided as they might be. As Yerushalimey points out, "I wonder how many Muslims thought to make a similar joint celebration..." After all, we are supposedly both "divine religions," right?

(Speaking of, I have finally heard a Jew refer to Judaism as a "divine religion." He was none other than "rabbi" Ahron Cohen of Neturei Karta, speaking in Iran at an anti-Zionist conference last week.)

Purim, for some reason, is called "Eid al-Msakr" in auto-translated Arabic. I couldn't figure out what word that might really be ( المساخر ) , although I would like to believe that it is meant to come from the word "masquerade."

The upshot of all this is that, just like wearing green on Purim is an interesting tradition when it coincides with St. Patrick's Day, wearing a Mohammed costume should be appropriate this Purim.

60 years ago: You can't always believe the experts

From the Palestine Post, March 7, 1949:

Dr. Solomon Zeitlin, considered the pre-eminent authority on the Second Jewish Commonwealth, dismissed a set of Hebrew writings found in Israel as "not an important discovery, and possibly a hoax."

Of course, these were the Dead Sea Scrolls.

Today's PalArab news (3-7-09)

In a move that may indicate that a combined Hamas/Fatah unity terror government is closer to reality, PA prime minister Salam Fayyad has resigned. He is the only Palestinian Arab leader in history to not have been tainted by obvious associations with terror, and under his government the PA received billions in Western aid, and took concrete steps to show responsibilty for security. His reign was far from perfect - the PA continued to payroll Hamas and shield terrorists from responsibility for their actions, they continued to praise terror and even pay terrorists in Israeli jails - but the past few months showed the fruits of Fayyad's labors, as Israel loosened restrictions on West Bank Arabs and their economy started to bounce back after the disaster of the intifada. People will look back at the past two years as being the best chance that Palestinian Arabs ever had for some sort of autonomy, as they will now slide back towards the terrorism that is part of their historical DNA.

Firas Press reports on a video going around Israel that claims that Israeli rabbis killed Gamal Nasser with Kabbalh-based "black magic."

Israel has been flooding mobile phones in Gaza with offers of $10 million for information on the whereabouts of Gilad Shalit.

Hamas found and dismantled a bomb placed in front of Al Jazeera's Gaza offices.

The Martian invasion

"Mr. President?"

President Mitchell slowly turned away from the Oval Office window, to see his Chief of Staff, Bill Rojas. Rojas was clearly agitated, but these days, who wasn't?

"Bill, don't be so formal. Come in, sit down. Maybe Laura can get you a coffee."

"No, thanks, Rob. It's just that the Martians..."

"Yes, I know. They are almost here. Richmond just disappeared."

Rojas exhaled. "And Norfolk. And Raleigh-Durham."

President Robert Mitchell paled slightly, but quickly regained his composure. "They aren't invincible, you know. We just have to find out their weakness. And I think I know what we can do to stop them."

"Really, Rob? What is it?"

"Give them Minnesota."

The room was silent for a moment.

"Give them....."

"Yes, Minnesota. Look, they clearly want land, right? They aren't conquering us for fun. The Martians have legitimate grievances against us, and it is time we treat them like human beings. We have been disrespectful to them, you know, calling them "bug-eyed" and shooting rockets at their warships - warships which are legal under international law, by the way."

"But Rob..." Bill sputtered. "How do you know they would be happy with Minnesota?"

"Bill, Bill. You've known me for years. I didn't become President because I did things unilaterally. I understand people, Bill! I have crafted compromises in the State Senate, in the US Congress, and I am sure I can compromise with the Martians as well! They aren't that different from you and me, after all. They have two eyes, just like us. They like to eat, just like us...."

"Rob, they eat people!"

"Come on, Bill, have you never heard of cannibals? Or those people from the plane crash who were stuck in the Andes? Seriously, you have to stop being so judgmental."

"But, Mr. President - how do you know they would be happy with Minnesota?"

Robert Mitchell sighed. "It is a nice place - lots of lakes, healthy people to eat, and cold, just like their planet. Besides, Minnesota didn't vote for me," he added with a chuckle. "Seriously, Martians didn't build interplanetary spaceships because they are stupid. If they are that advanced, of course they will compromise with us. Minnesota is just a beginning position to bargain with. Maybe they'll want North Dakota, too...but we'll never know until we start a dialogue with them. And negotiation means compromise, so we have have to offer something in our opening stance."

Bill Rojas, hesitantly, asked, "And if we give them Minnesota - they'll leave us alone?"

President Mitchell straightened up to his full 6'2" height. He never looked so presidential.

"I am sure about it, Bill. They are an advanced people; they will negotiate with us and take only what's fair. They aren't savages, and they have their pride. Everything can be discussed between adults of good will.

"We, as a people, desperately want the fighting to stop. We will have to make painful compromises for peace. But the peace, when it comes, will last forever."

Meshugene Men (Mad Men Purim parody)

I don't know who has the money to do such great videos, but this is fantastic:

Jewish students assaulted in U. Toronto "Apartheid Week"

From Then There Was Light, quoting an eyewitness:

Tonight at the U of T [Israeli Apartheid Week] event, two Jewish students were assaulted by the Palestinian “Security” team for being “disruptive” (asking a legitimate question “does Israel have a right to exist”) The Palestinian “security” smacked a student in the head and grabbed him by his neck, while another “security” officer told a second Jewish student to “Shut the F**ck up or he’ll saw his head off”…All of this was done in a crowded lecture room with over 100 witnesses!!

I was there, there are no pictures, filming and taking pictures was prohibited (they seem to have a problem with the general public hearing what they say) it was reported to the police who chose (as usual) to do NOTHING…

And here is what the student who was assaulted wrote:

I attended the Israel Apartheid Week event with a few friends and was prepared to ask a couple questions. The girl sitting next to me asked a question to one of the speakers about the problems with Hamas’s Charter. The speaker answered the question by discussing occupation and Israel’s “racist” policies, etc, instead of actually addressing the issue of Hamas’s Charter and denial of Israel’s right to exist. A couple people in the crowd, including myself, shouted out to the speaker “answer the question!” (It is generally fair game at these events where there are more activists present than observers to request that the speaker focus on the question asked). At this point, one of the (probably unlicensed) private security guards hired by SAIA approached me from behind. When I turned around in my seat to look at him, he grabbed and squeezed the back of my neck and growled at me from about 10 inches in front of my face “you shut the fuck up! shut the fuck up!” At this point I kept my cool moved back and I was like “get away from me bro, don’t touch me!” One of the event organizers called for someone to ask the police standing outside in the hallway to come in to remove me for “causing a disruption” at which point I encouraged the police to come in to record the name and identity of the individual who assaulted me. I left the room promptly and reported the incident to the police. I will be filing a formal report later today with Metro Police.

I personally believe in freedom of speech and that students should be allowed to book lecture halls to present speakers who express radical, even extreme views. The presence, however, of (probably) unlicensed, private security gaurds wearing bullet proof vests and leather jackets who physicaly assault people who speak up against those radical, extreme views, must be confronted. SAIA must not be allowed to bring hired goons onto campus to intimidate people who oppose their views. I feel ashamed as a UofT alumnus.

Freedom of speech!
(h/t Israellycool)

Today's PalArab media roundup

Hamas police made a drug bust of methamphetamines and hashish smuggled in Gaza tunnels.

A Russian analyst is quoted in Palestine Today as saying that by 2011, the United States would break up into six separate nations and that a new world currency will emerge to replace the dollar as Russia and China will be the new superpowers. All media, not just Arab, like to quote "experts" that confirm their own wishful thinking no matter how nutty. (Here's the original article from Russia in English. The Arabs believe it more than the Russians themselves do.)

PalToday also has a photo essay from the funeral of the Islamic Jihad terrorist turned to worm food by the IDF.

A new English-language publication is supposed to start in Gaza any day now. Called the Palestine Telegraph, the Free Gaza people are already salivating over it.

The Palestine Telegraph editing team seeks the following types of articles:

1- Articles that tackle daring ideas and are controversial or unconventional; as long as they are supported by factual and logical evidence and do not violate general Arab cultural norms or common decency.

2- Articles that present unprecedented ideas.

3- Articles on current events and an analytical perspective that transcends the obvious and rises above superficial reasoning.

4- Dramatic or satirical articles with an interesting and entertaining style.

Hey, maybe I'll submit things to it when/if it appears! Oh, wait - I think my articles might violate general Arab cultural norms, because I do not support terrorism.

By the way, the "professional" who is starting this is a 23-year old Gazan with a bachelor's degree in English. If that doesn't scream "professional," I don't know what does.

Terrorist supporters offended by Israeli cartoon

Ahmed and Salim is a funny, South Park-type cartoon made by two Israelis that make wicked fun of Arab terrorists. Naturally, this offends...the terrorists.

This article from the Islamic Jihad mouthpiece Palestine Today tells the ummah about this scourge, and is almost as funny as the cartoon itself:

The cartoon series "Ahmed and Salim" shows that the Israelis are determined to use the media machine to further tarnish the image of the Arabs. The series creators are from the young Israeli generation, adopting modern means of communication to promote racism: Tom Trager and Or Paz are authors of a series which show every week on YouTube.

"Ahmed and Salim" is a comedy that portrays Arabs as "terrorists" who want to kill Israelis and Americans for kicks. But these «terrorists» are always just plain wrong, turning the fire of terrorism on themselves because they always fail to target the Israelis and the Americans! The series, which has four episodes so far; the first had a record half-million views on «YouTube». However, the remaining three episodes were much more serious, as it confirmed its determination of the creators to deliver the the message that the Arabs are just «stupid», will not be able to convince anyone of the legitimacy of their cause, and that the resistance would only lead to a dead end.

The article goes on to mention that the UAE version of YouTube banned the cartoon and then goes on to give a synopsis of every episode.

It is hilarious that so many Arabs are offended by a cartoon that is clearly mocking only terrorists. It's almost as if they identify with Ahmed and Salim's hapless terrorist father...

Here's Episode 3:

More on non-Muslims using the word "Allah"

Yesterday, I reported on a controversy in Malaysia as to whether non-Muslims can use the word "Allah" in their writings. An interesting detail came out today:

A former grand imam of the National Mosque told the Dewan Rakyat today that the word "Allah" based on the belief of Muslims, cannot be used by the non-Muslims.

Taib Azamudden Mat Taib who is Pas representative for Baling, said this was because the meaning of Allah to other religions was different from the meaning of Allah to Islam.

I had never before heard a Muslim say that Allah was not the same as the God of Judaism or Christianity.

Either way, I would be remiss in not apologizing to the Muslims of Malaysia for using the word Allah in inappropriate, infidel ways. For example, these lyrics to the famous TV show "Allah in the Family":

Boy the way Mohammed prayed,
Dhimmi bodies getting flayed,
Nine year old brides getting laid,
Allah today!

Really tasteless, and I should be beheaded for writing such things.

UAE cleric: Women can become Muftis

Occasionally, a fatwa can be surprising in a pleasant way:

The Grand Mufti of Dubai, the leading Islamic legal scholar, has ruled that women can hold the position of mufti and issue religious rulings relevant to both men and women on every aspect of life.
Dr. Ahmed al-Haddad, Director of the Dubai Fatwa Department, issued a fatwa stating women can apply alongside men for the position of mufti.

"If a woman reaches the level of education that enables her to issue fatwas, then she has the right to work as a mufti and issue fatwas on all possible issues," Haddad said in his ruling.
Since issuing fatwas means informing people of the laws of God, anyone who has the required knowledge has the right to do so, said Haddad, citing a verse from the Quran that requires those who know about God's laws never to withhold the knowledge they have.

"These instructions from the Quran include everyone, male or female" Haddad said.

Islamic scholars define the position of "mufti" as someone who is qualified to apply the laws of God and the teachings of the prophet to contemporary issues, and Haddad underscored that such an ability is not confined solely to men.

Of course, any woman that actually tries to do this will be placing her life in her hands.

One more tunnel death

An 18-year old's body was recovered from a tunnel collapse a week ago.

The 2009 PalArab self-death count rises to 47.

UPDATE: Another body recovered plus one I had missed; 49.

John Kerry trusts dictators

A couple of days ago, Syrian state-run media published this press release:

Iranian President , Mahmoud Ahmadinejad , has underlined the deep strong standing relations between Iran and Syria, and the necessity for boosting them to meet the national interest of both and for reinforcing their steadfastness in the face of the various challenges.

During his meeting with Prime Minister , Mohammed Naji Otri today, Ahmadinejad expressed appreciation of Syria's stances under the leadership of President, Bashar al-Assad , and of Syria's pivotal and important role on all regional and international levels.

He indicated that the developments in the region and in the world have proven the correct stances of the two countries , as well as their righteous joint vision regarding these developments.

Ahmadinejad was briefed by Otri and by Iranian First Vice President , Parviz Davoodi , on the outcome of the meetings of the Syrian-Iranian Higher Committee , which falls in the service of the joint issues of cooperation in various domains.

Does this sound like a country that is eager to join the West against Iran?

Well, John Kerry thinks so:

Senator John Kerry of Massachusetts, who recently returned from a Middle East trip that included stops in Damascus and Gaza, called yesterday for loosening sanctions on Syria, which he praised for opening a stock market and sending an ambassador to Iraq.
In his speech, Kerry urged the Obama administration to play a role in mediating ongoing peace talks between Syria and Israel - a move he said Syrian President Bashar Assad would welcome.
The Bush administration shunned Syria for more than four years, accusing the regime of fostering the insurgency in Iraq, meddling in Lebanon's affairs by assassinating its elected leaders, and supporting anti-Israeli militant groups Hezbollah and Hamas.
But the Obama administration has signaled a thaw in relations in an attempt to encourage Syria to make peace with Israel and to pry the regime away from its close alliance with Iran.

If the Assad family knows anything, it is how to play boths sides against the middle while avoiding any concrete changes in its own regime.

The reason that strategy has been so successful for so long is because of credulous dopes like John Kerry.

Illegal Arab construction in Jerusalem

Last week, the PA called on Arabs to strike to protest alleged plans by Israel to demolish Arab homes in East Jerusalem. The Jerusalem Municipality released a statement showing that the rumors were lies, and that the demolition orders were in a different area that had been zoned and used as public space since Ottoman times. Not only that, but this illegal Arab construction in the King's Garden brought with it a huge amount of destruction to priceless antiquities.

Usually, "human rights" advocates and Palestinian Arabs claim that Arabs are at a disadvantage as the vast majority of houses ordered demolished in Jerusalem are Arab and that it is next to impossible for Arab Jerusalemites to get legal permits. It turns out that this is a lie. From JCPA:

In the Jewish neighborhoods, illegal construction typically takes the form of additions to existing legal structures - such as closing a balcony or hollowing out under a building to create an extra room. In the Arab sector, however, illegal construction often takes the form of entire multi-floor buildings with 4 to 25 living units, built with the financial assistance of the Palestinian Authority on land that is not owned by the builder.

Illegal construction has reached epidemic proportions. A senior Palestinian official boasted that they have built 6,000 homes without permits during the last 4 years, of which less than 200 were demolished by the city.
This frantic pace of illegal construction continues despite the fact that the city has authorized more than 36,000 permits for new housing units in the Arab sector, more than enough to meet the needs of Arab residents through legal construction until 2020.
Arab residents who wish to build legally may consult urban plans translated into Arabic for their convenience and receive individual assistance from Arabic-speaking city employees.
Both Arabs and Jews typically wait 4-6 weeks for permit approval, enjoy a similar rate of application approvals, and pay an identical fee ($3,600) for water and sewage hook-ups on the same size living unit.
The same procedures for administrative demolition orders apply to both Jews and Arabs in all parts of the city, as a final backstop to remove structures built illegally on roadbeds or land designated for schools, clinics, and the like.
The Palestinian Authority and Arab governments have spent hundreds of millions of dollars in an intentional campaign to subsidize and encourage massive illegal construction in the Arab sector, seeing this as part of their "demographic war" against Israel.
Many large, multi-story, luxury structures have been built by criminals on land they do not own, frequently land belonging to Palestinian Christians living abroad.
This epidemic of illegal construction is similar to illegal building that troubles cities in scores of countries worldwide and where the authorities utilize the law to demolish the structures.
More than any single factor, the 35-year-long boycott of municipal politics by the Palestinian leadership has resulted in the continued imbalance in municipal services in Arab neighborhoods vis-a-vis Jewish neighborhoods.
Despite frequent accusations that the city's planning policy seeks to "Judaize" Jerusalem, the Arab population of the city has increased since 1967 from 27% to 32%. Moreover, since 1967 new Arab construction has outpaced Jewish construction.

(h/t Daily Alert)

Iran unmasks the Elders

Iran's PressTV writes:

Zion elders wanted Muslims 'under thumb'

Iran's Parliament Speaker Ali Larijani says that the creation of Israel was aimed at placing Islamic states under Zionist influence.

In a speech delivered at the international conference in support of Palestinians in Tehran on Wednesday, Larijani said frequent tensions in the Middle East clearly show that the elders of Zion planned to preoccupy Islamic countries with daily struggles.

Larijani gave a prime example of exactly how we Elders are confusing Muslims every day, without his even realizing what an unwitting Zionist puppet he has become:

"The Palestinian crisis is a serious one with almost no precedent. Imprisoning millions of people in Israeli jails and turning millions of others into refugees over the past 60 years is but a portion of Israel's atrocities in Palestine," Larijani added.

Yes, the Elders have messed with Larijani's ability to understand simple numbers, and we have convinced him that we have huge prisons that hold millions of Arabs. As speaker of Parliament, he knows that the logistics involved in such an enterprise are extremely difficult, thus he is forced to fear the Zionists even more with our little trick of misdirection.

Not only that, Larijani helps prove that Iran itself is deeply under Zionist control, as at least half of Iran's public statements are fixated on Zionists! Our broad influence on Iran has distracted them from working on their own problems and building their own society, as they scramble to come up with new adjectives to sputter about how evil Zionists are - and conferences to use their latest insults. We even got him to think that Iran's "daily struggles" - like inflation and unemployment - are mere Zionist distractions that must be ignored.

The brilliance of the Elder plan (updated last week on a napkin in my dining room) is that his vitriol proves our plan's success. He's dancing to our tune, and he doesn't even know it!

(h/t Judeopundit)

Another brief demolition of Roger Cohen

If the examples I have given weren't enough, here's a letter to the New York Times concerning Cohen's belief that Iranian Jews are patriotic and free:

To the Editor:
As a Persian Jew whose family was sentenced to death by the Islamic Republic of Iran as “corrupters on earth” and “agents of Zionism,” I was amused by Roger Cohen’s vision of Iranian treatment of its Jewish population.
Perhaps Mr. Cohen should have interviewed the Persian Jews living in exile in Los Angeles, who would have told him not to assume that the Jews left in Iran can honestly complain about their status. If Iran is such a haven, why has the Jewish population of Iran only declined from the Safavid period, to 100,000 at the time of the Islamic Revolution to only 25,000 today?
Mr. Cohen could have asked my dad why Jews were called “ritually unclean” (a comment also reserved for stray dogs). He could talk to my grandfather about the pogroms that took place in Tehran and other cities when Jews walked on the same side of the street as a Muslim, or talk to the Jews of the city of Mashad who had to remain hidden as Jews for decades after being forced to convert to Islam.
Just because the Persians were not as efficient in killing or exiling their Jews as others were or just because there are a few synagogues left in Iran doesn’t mean that President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad does not mean it when he says that Israel should be wiped off the map, or that Ayatollah Ali Khamenei didn’t mean it when he said that Israel is a “cancerous tumor of a state” that “should be removed from the region.”
David Simantob
Los Angeles, March 2, 2009

In Iran, as in all Muslim states, the tolerance of other religions only extends to the point at which they are perceived to be slightly threatening. There are a few Jews left over in Egypt and Syria and Yemen, and as in Iran their governments like to point to them as proof of their tolerance. But they will only tolerate those who toe the line, who publicly agree with their totalitarian masters and who submit to second-class citizen status.

Proof that this is anti-semitism and not only anti-Zionism could be seen from a simple thought experiment:

Imagine how these tolerant governments would react if a Jewish community wanted to build a single synagogue that is taller than the surrounding mosques.