How Many Irreplaceable Men Must Die Before Enough Children Die To Force The World To Stop Israel? by Mahmoud Zahar (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

Check out their Facebook  and  Substack pages.

How Many Irreplaceable Men Must Die Before Enough Children Die To Force The World To Stop Israel?

by Mahmoud al-Zahar, Hamas co-founder, senior official, semi-retired

Ankara, September 4 - When we embarked on this glorious Al Aqsa Flood operation nearly two years ago, the Resistance did not expect events to play out exactly as they have. We assumed that, as every other time the violence got too out of hand, the international community would compel the Jews to cease fire while we celebrated the Islamic victory inherent in causing Jews to suffer, regardless of the cost to us. But we do know the cost: the number of precious fighters we lose in the effort to put our kids in harm's way in sufficient quantity to spark international condemnation of the Zionists and get them to halt their operations without achieving anything decisive. And that cost, contrary to our assessments, has proved higher than anyone expected, and the losses may well affect our ability to govern effectively. Now we must ask: How Many Irreplaceable Men Must Die Before Enough Children Die To Force The World To Stop Israel?

Every other time, the images and stories of suffering women and children, most of them fabrications, met the requirements of the reflexive antisemitism of the West, giving them a pretext to threaten the Jews to pull back, and have nothing to show for their casualties and expenditures. Sometimes we even kept the hostages we took!

Not this time. Our allies betrayed us. Hezbollah failed to open a second front concurrent with our operation, and by the time they did, the moment had passed. We made less progress on the seventh of October than we had assumed we would - the Zionists are still not demoralized and fleeing! How many years of shooting ourselves in the foot will it take for us to win?

Of course we are not to blame. That would be shameful, and shame is for others. We do not admit error. Perish the thought of any change in assumptions, strategy, or, Allah forbid, values! Every failure must be because of betrayal, not through any shortcoming of ours! Thus the Nakba, the Naksa, and every catastrophe since. We will have our vengeance on those who force us to sacrifice more men than we intended, so that more of our children die than we expected, so that it takes longer for the world to force Israel to leave us alone so we can do October 7 all over again in a few years.

Maybe we should get our allies in the NGOs and UN to demand that Israel allow in replacement fighters.

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More

EoZ cartoons (12-day war edition)

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More

For Your Convenience, Package Delivered Not To You, But Halfway Across Town (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

Check out their Facebook  and  Substack pages.

Jerusalem, August 28 - The courier company tasked with getting the item you ordered into your possession announced today by text message and e-mail that, to improve your experience as a customer of the company from which you ordered that product, said product will be waiting for you at a pickup point that requires you either to walk for some time in the summer heat, or to spend additional money on transportation to get there to claim the order, instead of the hassle you might face by having the parcel dropped off at your home address, which you provided when you submitted the order.

HCC, the delivery company subcontracted to deliver the apparel that you ordered online two weeks ago, notified you this morning that the package is waiting for you at a refreshment shop and newsstand three neighborhoods over from yours, for you to collect at your convenience, provided that your convenience coincides with the establishment's operating hours, and tough luck if that forces you to take time off from your regular daytime commitments to collect it. This, the delivery company assured you in the same message, is to help you, as everyone knows the kind of trouble that occurs when a package gets delivered to the very address where you told the supplier you wanted it delivered.

"For your convenience, we have delivered your order to Hertzl's Makkolet, at 3 Yahalom Street," the notification read. The location necessitates a twenty-five-minute walk in the sun from your current location, or a twenty-two-minute journey by public transportation, which also requires waiting in the sun - there is no convenient parking in the area, and you do not own a car anyway.

The location differs form the pickup point for previous orders you submitted, albeit not from the same seller and not through the same website as this one. Those establishments, while also not your address, at least lie within normal walking distance, and in locations near those of errands you run with some frequency.

"Store hours: 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. weekdays, closed on weekends," the message also stated. This added convenience will require you to clock out of your job to collect the delivery, since you work from 8:30 a.m. to 5:30 p.m. Your lunch break, which gets automatically deducted as thirty minutes if you do not clock out for it, will not provide enough time to get to Hertzl's Makkolet, collect the package, and return to your desk.

HCC also stated in the message that it will soon introduce further improvements to its services for your convenience, which, you assume, will include socks delivered to separate locations, at separate times, when you order them as a pair.

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More

EoZ cartoons from June (part 1)

Yes, I am way behind....These are from the first half of June, before the 12 day war.

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More

Mounting Casualties May Force Hamas To Use Adult Fighters (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

Check out their Facebook  and  Substack pages.

Mounting Casualties May Force Hamas To Use Adult Fighters

Gaza City, August 21 - The impending Israeli offensive into this urban center in the Gaza Strip threatens to put such a strain on the Islamist terrorists invested in the city that they may have no choice but to staff their ranks here with over-18 militants, perhaps even men, a battalion commander acknowledged today.

Hamas has lost tens of thousands of fighters since their invasion of southern Israel in October 2023, putting serious pressure on the organization's manpower reserves, estimated before the war at about 30,000. Replacements have had insufficient time to train, relegating many of them to ancillary non-combat roles. If, as expected, Israel begins its Gaza City offensive soon, to put further pressure on Hamas to release the 50 remaining October 7 hostages and hostage bodies, Hamas will find itself forced to plug the line with adults, stated Hamza Ashraf.

"We are running out of front-line children," Ashraf admitted. "If you want front-line troops, you must recruit the most motivated candidates. But we have slim pickings now. As much as it pains me to say so, we might have to start putting adults in the line of fire, and maybe even adult males."

"In retrospect, we could have used fewer children in digging the tunnels," he observed. "Or, at the very least, we could have implemented some real safety protocols so we wouldn't lose so many. But that's water under the bunker. Right now, we have some agonizing decisions to make if we're going to resist this upcoming assault."

The challenge for Hamas commanders, analysts say, lies in conflicting interests: slowing or stopping Israel's offensive through the infliction of heavy casualties, which does not square with the strategic Hamas approach of putting children in harm's way to exploit the images of their death and suffering to demonize Israel and isolate the Jewish State internationally. While the strategic approach has enjoyed much success, it has not deterred Israel from a stated commitment to crush Hamas and permanently remove the threat of another October 7.

"We have always considered the Zionists weak, and weak-willed," explained a Khan Yunis operative who specializes in booby-trapping buildings to collapse on IDF soldiers. "Our expectations for the [October 7] Al Aqsa flood were that the Jews would start fleeing. That's our expectation after every operation, really. We have no other way of thinking about things. So we figure, enough dead Israeli soldiers and they'll stop fighting. Our allies in Qatar, Moscow, and NGOs are very good at fomenting 'domestic' opposition to continued fighting, and that's part of what happened in every previous round. Sure, the enemy is more determined this time, but we don't expect the dynamic to change in quality, only quantity. But if we only use children, we inflict fewer casualties and that would squander the opportunity to hurt Jewish morale."

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More

Gaza Photographer Must Keep Asking Fat Guys To Stop Blocking His Shot Of Starving Kids (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

Check out their Facebook  and  Substack pages.

Gaza City, August 14 - A propagandist responsible for producing heart-rending images of desperate, hungry children, expressed exasperation today at the number of times he has had to yell at overweight men getting in the way of his work.

Anas Sidrati, 34, works as a photographer on behalf of Hamas, charged with setting up and photographing scenes calculated to tug at the heartstrings of gullible westerners, causing the dupes to believe that those children suffer severe malnutrition and deprivation as a result of Israel's alleged blockade of food into the territory - Israel lets in thousands of tons of food each week - even as fat men and women prowl the area where he tries to set his scenes and take the photos, often obstructing the process.

"Do they not realize what I'm trying to do?" he wondered. "It's not just that they get in the way. I understand, it can get crowded, we're out in public places. That happens, and it's annoying, but it happens. The issue is that if they do get caught in a photo, it's not just a bad photo - it undermines the entire message of the photo! How am I supposed to produce images that scream 'Famine!' 'Starvation!' when right next to these supposedly-starving kids there are guys who, no offense, would make a hippo say, 'Dude could stand to drop a few kilos.'"

Anas admitted that so far, even when images with the fat men get shared on social media, the "starvation" narrative prevails. "I don't know whether it's dumb luck, or a fluke, or what," he surmised, "but I do know I wouldn't want to bank on it continuing. I want to do my work properly."

"Maybe if we had some emaciated adults, we could produce a more convincing body of work," he added. "No one here wants to volunteer. We could recruit from elsewhere, I suppose. But because of the blockade, we can't get our hands on any malnourished adults, either. Curse those Jews!"

Gaza photographers and vloggers in general voiced disappointment in the impact their work has had. While many point to the international opprobrium directed at Israel, some question whether the photographs and video clips in particular can claim any credit for the phenomenon: the war in Gaza has not so much created vitriol toward Jews and the Jewish State, so much as allowed people who already nurtured that genocidal hate to feel comfortable expressing it directly.

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More

Culture That Made Jews Sit Through Weekly Anti-Jewish Sermons Calls Israel Intolerant (PreOccupied Territory)

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

Check out their Facebook  and  Substack pages.

Rome, August 7 - Religious leaders all over the Christian world that, for centuries, confined its Jews to ghettos and coerced them into attending Sunday church-service diatribes deeming them irredeemably perfidious, deicidal incorrigibles, continued this week to issue their longstanding characterization of Zionism and the state it founded as "Apartheid" and "racist."

Bishops, archbishops, and cardinals in the Roman Catholic Church, as well as numerous outspoken non-Catholic congregational figures, criticized Israel from their pulpits and keyboards, for mistreating the downtrodden Palestinians and committing human rights violations such as restricting Palestinian movement under the pretext of "security." Here in Rome, the papal authorities of the sixteenth century instituted a ghetto for the city's Jews, imposing a curfew and surrounding the squalid, flood-prone neighborhood with churches, monasteries, and convents where, once a week, Jews were forced to sit and endure fiery sermons denouncing them as devil-spawn and Christ-killers.

The accusations also included inversions of the hostage situation that unfolded in the Gaza Strip, with depictions of murderous and violent Palestinians in Israeli prisons as "hostages." That terminology unintentionally invoked the policy of those Christian institutions surrounding the ghetto to kidnap Jewish children and secret them away in monasteries and convents to raise them as Catholics.

Modern instantiations of earlier Christian treatment of Jews have also taken the form of the blood libel, a time-honored medieval Christian tradition that accuses Jews of making matza with the blood of a slain Christian child, resulting in massacres that local Christian leaders egged on; in its modern form, those religious leaders accuse Israel of starving the manifestly-still-overfed Gazans, or of killing Palestinian innocents who, if the incidents even occurred, died as a result of Hamas violence or Hamas use of those innocents as human shields - accusations that create a permission structure for even non-fighters to harm Jews anywhere in the world, and believe that in so doing they promote justice and righteousness.

Pope Leo XIV and his predecessor Francis - whose Renaissance predecessors directly issued the policies discriminating against the Jews of Rome - have both drawn rhetorical equivalence between brutal Palestinian terrorism and necessary Israeli measures to prevent or mitigate terrorism, calling on Jews to turn the other cheek as Christians have never done, despite Jesus urging his followers to do so in the Sermon on the Mount.

They have also urged an immediate ceasefire in Gaza, without regard for the fate of the Israelis held hostage there, a move that analysts says reflects a longstanding Christian tradition to sacrifice Jews to achieve higher goals, such as during massacres associated with the Crusades.

---

---

Buy EoZ's books  on Amazon! "He's an Anti-Zionist Too!" cartoon book (December 2024) PROTOCOLS: Exposing Modern Antisemitism (February 2022)

 

Read More