Thursday, July 11, 2024

Our weekly column from the humor site PreOccupied Territory.

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Flee Gaza? What Part Of 'Palestine Refugee' Is Unclear?  

by Ayama Baboon

Gaza City, July 14 - We Palestine Refugees, proud residents of this camp for more than seventy years, refuse to leave, even if the Occupation forces tell us to stay out of harm's way. What do they think refugees do, run away from violence? Someone has poor comprehension of the concept.

Our role in this conflict is to serve as a constant reminder that the Palestinian plight remains unresolved, and that we still yearn for the homes we left in 1948, or, if precedent is any indicator, to burn down the homes of Jews and slaughter people left and right. With some torture, gang rape, kidnapping, and mutilation thrown in for good measure. THAT's what being a refugee is about.

Well, that's what being a Palestine Refugee is about. I can't speak for refugees handled by that other UN agency, which for some reason tries to achieve permanent resettlement and citizenship for people fleeing other conflicts. Why do that when the refugees can serve as cannon fodder and a political tool to deflect domestic dissatisfaction? That other UN agency obviously doesn't understand what the concept of refugees is all about, either.

The Germans did it wrong. After they lost the Second World War, they were forced to absorb millions of ethnic Germans fleeing or expelled from lands the Third Reich had previously taken - the Palestinian model is so manifestly superior that I don't even know where to begin. The Germans should have refused to accommodate those refugees, instead keeping them in camps and fostering genocidal resentment among the camps' residents for generations against the countries they fled. Think how much more justice we would have in the world had they chosen the path of perpetual Resistance!

Perhaps the migrants from this part of the world now flooding into Europe can teach the locals how things are done. Initial signs are positive, but Europeans are slow learners.

A refugee's job is not to seek refuge, as the name might imply, but to prolong conflict for decades. That fundamental point eludes the world, except in the crucial case of Palestine, where its practice represents the only true fulfillment of the concept. Refugees do not flee. We embody rage, violence, and collective assignment of guilt to the people yet unborn when our plight began, but who refuse to surrender their security, lives, homes, or possessions to satisfy only the most extreme definition of "justice."

Educate yourselves.




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