Iranian Revolutionary Guards anticipates first Iranian nuclear bomb test

From MEMRI:

An article posted April 24, 2011 on Gerdab, the website of the Iranian Revolutionary Guards Corps (IRGC), envisions the day after Iran's first nuclear test. The article states that Iran's first controlled nuclear explosion will not disrupt the daily lives of Iranians, but will only boost their national pride. However, it says, in the Arab world, in the West and in Israel, it will sow a sense of fear mingled with respect for Iran's achievement.

The article makes satirical comments on Iran's charged relations with the Arabs and with the West.

The following are excerpts from the article:[1]

"The day after Iran's first nuclear test will be an ordinary day for us Iranians. But many of us will have a new gleam in our eyes.

"It's a fine day. The hour is 7:00 AM. The sun is not yet fully up, but everything is already clear. Many countries in the northern hemisphere are starting their day. It's the first dawn after Iran's nuclear test. It's an ordinary day.

"Yesterday, an underground nuclear explosion took place, probably [somewhere] in the deserts of central Iran, where the Americans and some of the [other] Western countries once wanted to bury their nuclear waste. The blast was not so powerful as to cause much damage to the region, but not so weak as to cause the Iranian nuclear scientists any problem in their experiment.

"It's an ordinary day, and just like on any [other] day when there is news from Iran – which is 90% of year – we see reports on the foreign news websites, and they read as follows:

"Reuters: 'Iran Detonates Its Nuclear Bomb.'


"CNN: 'Iran Detonates Nuclear Bomb.'


"Al-Jazeera: 'Iran Has Tested Its Second Nuclear Bomb.'


"Al-'Arabia: 'A Shi'ite Nuclear Bomb Has Gone Off.'


"Yahoo News: "Nuclear Explosion in Iran."


"The Jerusalem Post: 'The Mullahs Have Obtained Nuclear Weapons.'


"The Washington Post: 'Nuclear Explosion in Iran; Shock and Anxiety in Tel Aviv.'

The local [Iranian press] will also shower this achievement by the Hidden Imam and the Leader [Khamenei] with words of praise, as follows:

"Kayhan: 'Iran Has Tested Its First Nuclear Bomb.'


"Jomhouri-ye Eslami: 'Iran Carries Out Successful Nuclear Test.'


"Iran [a popular pro-Ahmadinejad daily]: 'On President's Orders, Iran Tests All-Iranian Nuclear Bomb.'


"Ettelaat: 'Iran Detonates Long-Awaited Nuclear Bomb'...

"It will be a news storm, but it will not disrupt normal [daily] life in Iran. Employees will come to work and punch the clock on time, or [at most] a little late. Bakers will not bake unsubsidized bread. Broadband Internet will function as usual, and even this storm will not make it any cheaper, nor will it cause [Iranian] TV to rethink its policy on the airing of foreign programs.

"The day after Iran's first nuclear test will be an ordinary day for us Iranians, but many of us will have a new gleam in our eyes – a gleam of national pride and might.

"[Koran 8:60:] 'And prepare against them what force you can and horses tied at the frontier, to frighten thereby the enemy of Allah and your enemy'"

Any questions?

(h/t Missing Peace)