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Friday, February 03, 2006

Iranian police: Israel smuggling liquor into Iran

Those crafty Joooooz!
Tehran, Feb 1 - Iranian police announced on Tuesday that Israel is behind the smuggling of liquors into Iran.

"Foot print of Israeli companies and affiliated security organizations is seen in the smuggling of liquors to Iran," said local police commander Colonel Hossein Abdi in an interview with IRNA here on Tuesday.

Abdi said that Israeli companies, backed fully by the smugglers, transit liquors to Iraq via Ibrahim Khalil border and from there to Iran.

He said that Israeli security organizations are in efforts to spread flagrancy and corruption among young generation to harm the Islamic establishment.

He added that the facilities of the companies have been put at the disposal of the smugglers to motivate them to be active in the business.

To support his claim, Abdi said that the detained smugglers have confessed that the companies selling the liquors inside Iraqi territory receive the consignment when it is delivered safely to the destination.

He said since the start of the current Iranian year on March 21, 2005, more than 210 bottles and cans of liquors have been confiscated from smugglers in Mahabad.
So over 11 months, they confiscated about five cans of beer a week.

But I think that they are onto something. The morality of the Persian people is way too high (blowing up millions of Jews - good, having a woman drive a car - bad) and the Zionists need to tempt them with Western vices. It is time for the Elders to work on an initiative to spread flagrancy and corruption.

It should be called the Immorality to Really Anger Nutcases initiative.

A few bottles of booze is just the beginning. Immorality takes many forms, and poisoning the pure minds of Persians is a worthy goal.

IRAN will use the global resources of the Zionists to undermine Iranian morality. The best way to do this is to disguise it as an anti-Zionist message, making it easy to infiltrate past the borders of the holy Islamic Republic.

First, we will publish pamphlets that show just how degraded and immoral the Zionist West has become. This pamphlet will be liberally illustrated with examples, such as the scandalous attire worn on the red carpet of the Oscars. Chapter 8 will be titled "Very Immoral Content! Do Not Read Unless You Are Pure of Mind!" and will include soft core porn, Budweiser ads and Mohammed cartoons.

Videos wil also have to be produced using our Hollywood connections. The storylines will be of a familiar theme: Hook-nosed cannibal rabbis stealing the eyes of Palestinian children, the normal Muslim prime-time fare. But then the bearded rabbis will make a trip to the beach in Eilat to plan to jam Iranian air force radar and in the background will be topless European women frollicking in the surf. After 30 minutes of this scene, the rabbis will join them to play volleyball. These videos will play on the Zionist Al-Jazeerah network.

In order to stop Iranian intelligence to find out about these plans, pictures of female ankles should be placed in strategic places of the written instructions. The pure Persians will be forced to avert their eyes and we can continue our nefarious plans to contaminate and ultimately dominate the Islamic world.