Wednesday, July 20, 2011

"How to tell an Arab far-leftist"

There is a Twitter hashtag, mostly written by Arabs,  called "#HowToTellAnArabFarLeftist." A lot of them are quite funny - and many apply to leftists altogether.

Here are some of the entries:

  • can't see a single leading communist country but still thinks communism is the best, ohh just like islamists yeah
  • when they say that Nutella is an American conspiracy product to taint the brains of 3 yr old kids.
  • All our problems are from colonialism, till now, duh. (oh shit US was colonized bt UK? Nevermind!)
  • mention colonialism every 5 min even though foreign aid has hurt economies much worse.
  • They despise the west and United States but they probably graduated from American University of Beirut
  • they voted for Bush in 2000 because Gore's running mate was Jewish...then they complain about how Bush "stole" Florida
  • they think Norman Finkelstein is a genius
  • "there has always been a secret American plan to invade and split up Iraq into 3 countries."
  • Castro is not ruining Cuba. He is merely teaching his people how common misery is better than greedy capitalism.
  • "The Israel lobby controls the media and the U.S. government."
  • "my daughter is only allowed to marry from my village"
  • the UN is a Zionist conspiracy. The Israel lobby is America's shadow government. Syrian revolt a conspiracy too.
  • a sentence cannot be formed w/o: zionist, racist, imperialism, puppets, conspiracy, corporate.
  • Gulf Princes are American puppets, Levant Dictators are Zionist agents, Maghreb autocrats are Colonial servants
  • "USSR didn't lose the war of Ideas... Obama is a secret communist you know."
  • Speaking out against religious extremism is so passé compared to railing against corporations
  • Wears the Kaffiyye for protests, then takes it off before going to work... in Mcdonald's.
  • "Starbucks gives money to Israel" so do you with your tax dollars now GTFO
  • they bitched and moaned when Bush passed the patriot act and said nothing when Obama renewed it
  • Bush hated Muslims for Iraq and Afghan but Obama doesn't and stays there and attacks Libya, Yemen and Somalia
  • Obama loves Muslims because of a Ramadan YouTube video
  • "Palestinians aren't allowed to own land in Lebanon because they want them to go back to their homeland"
  • holocaust denial. Sad but true.
  • The only scholar worth mentioning in regards to the Middle East is Edward Said.
  • If you criticize West they're your best friend,if you criticize Arabs they support you're guilty of Orientalism.
  • "we're replacing Mubarak thugs w our much nicer ones who'll punish the real bad guys (e.g Investors)"
  • Saddam Hussein was a good guy he is just misunderstood.
  • Rage rage against human rights abuses by Obama and Bush. Crickets chirping with regard to Castro, Lenin, Stalin
  • they are secular but praise Osama bin Laden and yell about it on al-Jazeera while screaming conspiracy.
  • their vocabulary consists in one word: colonialism. Ok two, they can say it in Arabic too: ???????
  • Having an import cup of coffee at a super lavish cafe while discussing child labour
  • sympathizes with and takes photos of homeless people from his 1000$ Canon camera
  • tweets frequently about the rights of the poor from his iPad
  • he can't be bothered to explain himself coz he always assumes u dont know what u are talking about, yells GO READ
  • yells & screams in Tahrir demanding minimum wage but is driven around town by driver earning eq of $100 a month
  • u thnk wearing a Keffiyeh & nagging will free Palestine, but an economically strong arab world won't.
  • give you a long lecture about horror of fascist dictatorship then praise #Stalin
  • strongly supports freedom of speech except when you disagree with his beliefs
  • they don't smile because smiling is a western conspiracy to distract us from their plot to destroy us.
  • they love revolutions and elections but hate liberty
  • they would rather Palestine never get a state always be occupied, to bitch, rather than them get half the loaf.

(h/t JW)